ABOUT ME
By
Francis William Bessler
October 18th,2012;
modified somewhat: April 22nd, 2019
Wholy One
I consider myself to be about Life first - and then me only within Life. For the most part, I think, my writings and productions reflect that perception. I do not exist in some sort of isolation. I only exist as part of the whole; and that is my main perception of me; but as I am, you are too. Thus, as I see myself, I see others; and as I see others, I see myself.
How do I see "the whole," then? I see it as HOLY. Why? Because I see the Whole as being nothing more than the equivalent of the INFINITE. How could it be that the INFINITE is not also HOLY because, in fact, if there is GOD, that GOD must be equal to that which is INFINITE? Accordingly, if the Whole is the INFINITE - and the INFINITE is necessarily HOLY because it is necessarily equal to GOD - then "me" as part of that HOLY INFINITY must be HOLY as well. And there it is - my “whole” definition of me - and you.
It was not always that way with me, however. That I will admit. Born on December 3rd, 1941, I grew up a Catholic Christian on a small farm in northern Wyoming; and that belief taught that some are holy and some are not. That belief did cause me some concern - and at times, considerable grief, because I was never sure that I was one of the "holy ones." No one wants to be among the "non-holy;" and that definitely included - and includes - me.
The main path I used to find the real me, however, and the real truth was writing. That is as much a part of my history as anything - writing to find the truth. It is probably one of those things that one can know the benefits of only by doing it. Those who have not chosen writing to learn about life probably have no sense of what I am talking about - simply because they have not experienced it.
Having been a writer, however, has not only taught me the general truth of things - including the truth of my soul - but it has taught me one of the most valuable lessons any man can learn - NO ONE KNOWS THE TRUTH WITH ABSOLUTE CERTAINTY. In a way, then, I cannot claim that writing has taught me any definite truths. It has only taught me "probable truths;" but in learning that, I have also become aware that as it has been for me, it is really for anyone who writes about anything that cannot be defined with a sense of the definite.
The Scriptures
Among other things, the idea that no one can know the truth about what might be called the "indefinite," has put in true perspective the so called "scriptures." Like any writing, when about things that cannot be proven or disproved - the so called "scriptures" are simply opinion or fabrication - often expressed as more than that - but in reality - only that. This I have come to believe - mostly because living has demonstrated its "probable truth."
When I was a kid - and even well into my adulthood - I believed the so called "scriptures" were absolutely true because I believed they were somehow "written by God." Well, that is what I was told - and for the longest time - what I believed. Writing, however, has taught me that in all likelihood, all writing - including any so called "scriptures" must be purely speculative because, in the end, all scripture has been written by man - or a human being – not God.
Indeed, any writer can believe he or she is being “inspired” of or by God to do what he or she does, but if God is truly IN all as I have come to believe, we are all inspired of God in a general sense, but it is unlikely one of us is particularly inspired in some solitary fashion. I am being “inspired” of or by God to write this, but that inspiration is no different than what any one experiences to simply manage life. The problem is most are unaware of their own “inspiration.” Or so, I Believe!
It was not "reading the scriptures," however, that taught me that ALL LIFE MUST BE HOLY. It was writing about it myself. I realize many writers have not been about "finding the truth" by writing, but that has been my direction and reason for writing - knowing full well that I can be wrong about anything. Just in writing about something does not assure one of finding the truth, but it does offer a very definite advantage. At least one gets the sense that they can be wrong when tackling sometimes confusing issues; and in just knowing one can be wrong, getting things right becomes an ideal, but not a necessity.
As suggested, however, I do believe that one can suspect "probable truth" - even though that "probable truth" may turn out to be false in the end; but given that it's the same with everyone, it's ok to be "possibly wrong." Again, I think there is tremendous advantage in just knowing you might be wrong. I think it is those who have been absolutely sure they are right that have caused the most terror and tragedy in human history. It simply goes with the territory of being sure you are right that you are willing to impose what is pure opinion in reality on others outside yourself; and it is such imposition that causes so much pain and suffering in the world.
Among
The Least Dangerous
In that light, I am the LEAST DANGEROUS person in the world - or among the least dangerous. In not being absolutely sure of my own "probable truths," I can in no way feel comfortable imposing my ideas on others. All I can do is SHARE my ideas; and let others judge as they choose.
Who am I? My writings - and productions - offered in this website will tell you that. What can I offer to others with my writings - which I admit are mostly speculations? Perhaps nothing, but also perhaps a lot. Indeed, I might offer nothing to those who see my writings as impertinent simply because those writings do not reflect any sense of their own lives. Thus, if my writings are irrelevant to some, then those some cannot find in my writings anything useful.
But some may find some of what I have found worthwhile too; and it is to those few or those many that I dedicate all my writings. Consider my writings to be gifts, but please do not consider them as right or wrong. I suppose some of my thoughts do reflect the actual truth of things; and almost for sure, some of them offer a lack of truth too - simply because a fallible one such as me cannot deliver infallible truth - but neither can anyone else offer infallible truth about indefinite matters no matter how much they might claim to do so.
I do believe I am right about many of the notions I have speculated upon, however. Sure, being fallible, I can be wrong; but being wise, I am probably more right than wrong. I must admit I speculate about things completely out of my training as a person - such as cancer and arthritis. That speculation has a much greater chance of being wrong simply because of a lack of knowledge about the human body; however most of my writings are of what I call a spiritual or intellectual nature. In that arena of things, my chances of being right are much greater than my chance of being right about such things as cancer and arthritis. To put it simply, compared to interest in soulful matters, interest in purely body matters for me is practically negligent.
The Soul
I think no one loves the body more than I do because I see the body as simply part of a wonderful whole - and my writings will express that love a lot; but equal to the body within my love of things is the soul. Of course, all speculation on the soul is like all speculation about indefinite matters - pure opinion. The soul is one of the entities that no one can define because we can't see the soul - or feel it or smell it or hear it. It is assumed to exist because it seems to make no sense to a lot of us that it does not exist.
I am one of those many who believe that the lack of a soul for a human person makes no sense; but I am one of a very few who have dared to really look into the soul - or have dared to analyze it for what it probably is. Like all things indefinite - or things that we cannot define for lack of scientific measurement to define them - the soul can still be analyzed like the notion of an INFINITE GOD can be analyzed. GOD cannot be measured anymore than the soul can be measured, but that has not stopped many writers in offering their views about GOD. Has it?
Looking upon the soul as a friend, I think my life and my writings reflect that love a lot; and for what it's worth, it may well be my emphasis on the soul that separates my writings - and perhaps my life - from many others due to my spiritually scientific mind. By "spiritually scientific," I mean to say that I try to treat the spiritual soul in a scientific way - as in analyzing it for probable origin, conduct, and destiny. Again, the emphasis on probable. No one can know for sure about the soul anymore than one can know about the INFINITE and GOD because all three are of indefinite or indefinable realities, but knowing that no one can know for sure about any of these things, I have dared to think about them and my thinking about them is expressed in my writings.
In a very definite way, I think my life - as any life - can be defined as the journey of a soul. I have loved my soul as I have loved my body because I see the soul as occupying my body to know about itself - my soul. I think many think of the soul as some invader of a body that somehow gets stuck in a body and can't wait to escape it - as if an initial occupation of a body was a mistake. That kind of thinking completely escapes me because I think it is totally illogical. Why would my soul occupy my body just to escape it? And yet many - if not most - in this world treat their souls like some kind of body invaders rather than friends. Where is the logic in that?
My Writings And Me
Consider my writings (about 203 songs, 7 stories, and 150 essays) to be an evolution of my understanding of me - if you wish - because that is what they really are. I started writing as a child, but kept none of it. My earliest writing that I have saved was written in 1963 in my third year of study for the Catholic ministry at the age of 21. I was studying for the Catholic ministry at St. Thomas Seminary in Denver, Colorado and I wrote a poem or song I called "Prayer Of A Priest." That was when I still saw GOD as a person that is outside of me because I had not yet realized that GOD must equal INFINITY - given that an INFINITE actually exists.
Then in 1964 or so - while still a student for the Catholic ministry - I began to question that GOD can be separate from me at all because of the notion - and probable reality - of INFINITY. I wrote a very poor allegory story I called WISDOM in which I had an angel I called Wisdom instructing teenagers Innocence & Simplicity about the real meaning and wholesomeness of life. In that process, I conflicted with traditional Christian teaching that life is sinful - not wholesome. Perhaps fearing anticipated disagreement with a Catholic faculty, I did not reveal my story to seminary faculty until my 5th year of study, but shortly after I did share my story, I was dismissed from further study because your thinking is not that of a Catholic priest. Of course, it wasn't either - and deep down, I knew I was treading on dangerous territory by writing such a challenging story. With my story of WISDOM, however, I really began to use writing as a vehicle to question life and its meaning. WISDOM probably wasn't very good, but it was a start.
Subsequently, however, the original personally typed copy of WISDOM has been lost - and that has been the fate of many things I have written to research the truth down through the years. Not all has been lost, however, and most of my writings that I have been able to preserve is now included in this website. In 2012, I arranged all my writings in the order in which I wrote them to that time and divided those writings into seven epochs - as it were - with each epoch (or volume) spanning a certain period of time - from 1963 to 2012.
The result is a 1,500 pages, 10 volume, series of writings I call OUT IN THE OPEN. Volumes 1 through 7 feature writings in the order in which they were written, with each volume spanning a certain period of time in my life. Volume 8 features all the songs I had written to the time of 2012 - but which are also featured in their chronological order in the first 7 volumes. In addition, I wrote a summary OVERVIEW volume and added an ONGOING volume that features extended writings after the original 7 volumes were completed – though only until my website had been originally compiled in late 2012. After 2012, however, when my website was initially composed, any new writings have been added as blogs in my ongoing BLOG feature of my website.
Since the initial compilation of my original website in 2012, however, at the urging of my dear friend and companion, Nancy Shaw (who I married on 4/28/2018), we decided to compile many of the OUT IN THE OPEN features and new essays and songs written since 2012 into printed books that have also been secured as digital files via an online process called Kindle. In all, we have printed 8 books that are available via Amazon and Kindle; though all of my books were originally produced via an online publishing company called Create Space – which as of early this year of 2019 has merged with Amazon. The entire purpose of this late enterprise has been to make more of my writings and thoughts and opinions available to the public – for those of the public who might care to read them, of course. See this website for links to all 8 books. OK?
I suppose it is worth noting that in transcribing earlier writings included in the OUT IN THE OPEN feature of this website into printed books, I tried to correct grammatical errors as I found them – and modify a writing for more clarity as I determined ideal. Not that it matters, but I do believe it is worth noting in the event that one might compare a writing found in the OUT IN THE OPEN feature of this website with that same writing as found in one of my books. For what it’s worth, I consider myself a “student/master” of life – and a “student/master” is always open to correction and change, know what I mean? I am always learning. How about you?
The Rest Of Me
I think that should suffice for this brief intro of me. Of course my works will tell much more of my story. In short, I think my story is the story of all - in terms of natural blessings living in life. I am not alone. I am only one of everyone. To know yourself is to know me - if you really know yourself.
For what it's worth, I think that is what Jesus taught too - that one could be a true disciple of his only if each knew him or herself as the same as Jesus. That is not the story of Jesus that's normally told because few equate Jesus with themselves. In fact, many do not want such an equation because they feel unworthy by themselves. It is because of their unworthiness that they need a saving Jesus, but I think the ones who wrote about such a Jesus got Jesus wrong from the get-go; and that is probably why Jesus has been defined as a lord that others need and not the true master he probably was – and encouraged others to be.
The difference, as I see it, between a spiritual lord and master is that a “lord” requires servants for feeling superior to those servants – and servants require a lord for feeling inferior to a lord. A “master,” however recognizes that all are equal due to God being in All, thus making everyone and everything equally worthy. I think Jesus encouraged us all to be our own masters - and much of that is found in my writings - all of which I am giving to the world in this website.
As you will find, however, if you review any of what I have written, I rely a great deal on two relatively unknown gospels for my own view of Jesus. I will not go more into that vision of Jesus here, but suffice it for now that I rely heavily on THE GOSPEL ACCORDING TO THOMAS and THE GOSPEL ACCORDING TO MARY MAGDALENE, both banned for the most part in the 4th Century when “The Church” decided to compile a “BIBLE” of acceptable works of religious nature to serve as a literal guide to human behavior. In deciding on “acceptable” works, however, to fit into a “new BIBLE,” various “unacceptable” works were not only excluded from the “new BIBLE,” but were also banned. Among those works are THE GOSPEL ACCORDING TO THOMAS and THE GOSPEL ACCORDING TO MARY MAGDALENE – upon which much of my own vision and understanding of Jesus has been derived. See the books listed in my website for further coverage. OK?
Thank you so much for your attention! Enjoy my website and thinking as you will; and feel welcome to refer any you wish to this site.
Good Luck to us All! May we All Realize The Sacred within us – as we Celebrate the Wonderful, Mystical thing we call “LIFE”!
Gently,
Francis William
(Frank, Will)
Bessler
Laramie, Wyoming